I Like Switchfoot

Go listen - http://www.switchfoot.com/index2.html

"There's just two ways to lose yourself in this life.
And neither way is safe" ~The Economy of Mercy, Switchfoot

Something More (Augustine's Confession) ~ New Way to Be Human
Augustine
Just woke up with a broken heart
All this time
He's never been awake before

At thirty-one
His whole world is a question mark
All this time
He's never been awake before

Watching dreams that he once had
Feed the flame inside his head
In a quiet desperation of the emptiness he says...

"There's got to be something more
Than what I'm living for
I'm crying out to You"

Augustine
All his fears keep falling out
All this time
He's never been awake before

Finding now
His old dreams aren't panning out
All this time
He's never been awake before

But he's mad to be alive
And he's dying to be met
In a quiet desperation of the emptiness he says...

"Hey, I give it all away
Nothing I was holding back remains
Hey, I give it all away
Looking for the grace of God today"


"There's got to be something more
Than what I'm living for
I'm crying out to You"


The Losers ~ Learning to Breathe
Only the losers win
they've got nothing to prove
They'll leave the world with nothing to lose
You can laugh at the weirdos now
Wait till wrongs are right
They'll be the ones with nothing to hide

'Cause I've been thinking
I've got a plan to lose it all
I've got a contract pending on eternity
If I haven't already given it away
I've got a plan to lose it all

I've been the burnout kid
I've been the idiot
I'll turn the other cheek to be hit
You can take what you want from me
Empty me till I'm depleted
I'll be around if I'm ever needed

I wrote this song for you
To show how I'm selling out
I'll take the benefit of the doubt


Life and Love and Why ~ Legend of Chin
Life and love and why
Child, adult, then die
All of your hoping
And all of your searching
For what?
Ask me for what am I living
Or what gives me strength
That I'm willing to die for

Take away from me
This monstrosity
'Cause my futile thinking's
Not gonna solve nothing tonight
Ask me for what am I living
Or what gives me strength
That I'm willing to die for

Could it be this
Could this be bliss
Could it be all that
I ever had missed
Could it be true
Can life be new
And can I be used
Can I be used

Give me a reason
For life and for death
A reason for drowning
While I hold my breath
Something to laugh at
A reason to cry
With everyone hopeless
And hoping for something
To hope for

Could it be true
Can life be new
Could it be all that I am
Is in You
Could it be this
Could it be bliss
Can it be You


Home ~ Legend of Chin
It's a long way from Miami to LA
It's a longer way from yesterday
To where I am today

It's a long way from my thoughts
To what I'll say
It's a long, long way from paradise
To where I am today

All that's in my head
Is in Your hands

It's a long way from
The moon up to the sun
It's a longer road ahead of me
The road that I've begun

Stop to think of all the
Time I've lost
Start to think of all the
Bridges that I've burned
That must be crossed

Take me over

I've been poison
I've been rain
I've been fooled again

I've seen ashes
Shine like chrome
Someday I'll see home

I can see the stars
From way down here
But I can't fall asleep
Behind the wheel

It's a long way from the
Shadows in my cave
Up to Your reality to
Watch the sunlight taking over

Living is Simple ~Learning to Breathe
Living is simple
It's gravity
Gravity isn't so hard
Living is simple
It's entropy
Entropy, falling apart
I'm falling apart again

Living is simple
And breathing is easy
It's easy to do
Living is simple
And losing is easy
I'm losing my cool
I'm losing my cool again

All will be made well
Is this fiction?
Hope has given himself to the worst
Is this fiction or divine comedy?
Where the last of the last finish first
Living is simple

Living is dying
Your mercy, Your mercy
Is how I believe
Living is dying
I can't understand it
I'm down on my knees
Confessing my needs again

I've had my choices
I've chosen today
I've had my choices
The choices remain

On Fire ~ The Beautiful Letdown
They tell you where you need to go
They tell you when you need to leave.
They tell you what you need to know
They tell you who you need to be.

But everything inside you
knows there's more than what you've heard
There's so much more than empty conversations
filled with empty words

And you're on fire
when he's near you
You're on fire when he speaks
You're on fire burning at these mysteries

Give me one more time around
Give me one more chance to see
Give me everything you are
Give me one more chance to be near you

When everything inside me
Looks like everything I hate
You are the hope I have for change
You are the only chance I'll take

And I'm on fire when you're near me
I'm on fire when you speak
I'm on fire burning at these mysteries

I'm standing at the edge of everything I've ever been.

Busyness, Summer jobs, and cell phones

So my schedule has been really packed of late and it looks like there's no sign of any rest any time soon. I recently found out about a summer job here at college that would be a really good thing for future resumes but the application process is fairly rigorous and coming up fast. So I have that to worry about. Plus I've had tests and articles to write and compositions and always practicing and who knows what else.

We finally celebrated my brother's birthday this weekend and it was actually really fun. Kanns, his in-laws, came over along with him and Jenny and we were up pretty late just telling stories. I was afraid I would be left out (as is sometimes the case in family gatherings, my cousin says I'm my own generation) but all those years of sitting around listening to the art of adult conversation are finally paying off. This may explain why I connect with my professors more than I connect with many students... I never had a chance to be normal I guess.

In the meantime my parents also broke down and bought me a cell phone with very little pressure on my part. It could have something to do with when I worried them sick a couple of Fridays ago because I was detained looking for my brother's birthday present. :-) So I am adjusting to having the annoying little thing on my person almost always. I'm just waiting for it to go off on class. I'm new to this and doing it against my will!

Even though this weekend is a three-day weekend things look like they will be busy as ever. My Sunday is absolutely packed with an SMTA music recital I have to attend at 4:00, a "scholarship dinner" at 5:30, and a classical guitar concert at 7:30. Plus I'm going to have to throw together my first Reporting for Mass Media in that time. I'm about to head off to the music building for a long uninterrupted spell of composing/practicing. I HATE composing dang it. I'm too much of a perfectionist to get anywhere with it at my current level of education. And I just genuinely don't enjoy doing it. Improvising is fun and spontaneous. Composing is drawn-out and painful. But I have to do it for class so too bad.

My ever-emotional relationship with music has been rather a rollercoaster of late, but what else is new? I wonder just how much I gripe about music on this blog... Ah well, it's therapeutic. Firstly, piano lessons with my two little students have been going very well. Grace is learning more in a lesson than I used to in weeks and Grant is finally starting to make some of those difficult connections required when you first start to read music. It's the dad that's the problem. I've never met the man and apparently he's never taken piano lessons but I always get to hear his opinion on my teaching. Lately he's been wanting Grant to work on scales. Grant's still learning how to read music! But I suppose it won't hurt anything so I found some 5-finger ones and we'll see if that ameliorates my critic.

I've really been stepping up on practicing. 2 hours a day is my goal, one for jazz and one for classical and one day off for a sabbath. But it takes discipline I don't have. I've been making a lot of progress on jazz though, or I thought I had. After an excellent first lesson I completely foundered during the second. Hm. What surprises me is how well my classical studies have been going. I've finally figured out that I HAVE been learning something important from Bev, and that is to play emotionally on command. I think this is what she's been looking for from the start and now I can begin to do it. I'm learning to overcome my nervousness and anxieties and just play the music. It's very satisfying.

Oh goodness what else... I guess nothing of terrible importance. I won't go into a long rant about cell phones because that would be even more pointless and boring than my rants about music. :-) Anyhow, this was a nice break from my busy day but I'd better get some dinner/lunch at Saga before my long, long, long night. In addition to these monster compositions I have reading for Reporting for Mass Media and it looks like a couple of interviews for my article I need to prepare for. Oh help.

German Poetry

A lot of people in my German class hate it, or don't understand it.

Liebeslied

Wo mag meine Heimat sein?
Meine Heimat ist klein,
Geht von Ort zu Ort,
Nimmt mein Herz mit sich fort,
Gibt mir Weh, gibt mir Ruh;
Meine Heimat bist du.

Love Song
Where might my home be?
My home is small,
Goes from place to place,
Takes my heart along with it,
Gives me pain, gives me peace;
My home is you.
~Hermann Hesse

Wanderers Nachtlied
Über allen Gipfeln
Ist Ruh,
In allen Wipfeln
Spürest du
kaum einen Hauch;
Die Vögelein schweigen im Walde.
Warte nur, balde
Ruhest du auch.

(My rough translation) Wanderer's Night Song
Over all the mountain peaks
There is peace,
In all the tree tops
You feel
Hardly a breath;
The little birds in the forest are silent.
Only wait, soon
You will also rest.
~Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

"Thank Gott, we Germans believe in sentiment, and keep ourselves young mit it."
~Professor Bhaer, Little Women

WhY!?

It's Monday...



~I Went to College and it was Okay

Special Tea!

So Saga (or Sodexho) took over Stan's coffee shop on campus this year. It was sad. I mean, it's a nice place, but Saga is evil. At least Stan's still around as manager, but I liked it better when he was independent. The worst thing was they took away "Special Tea," one of the most amazing things I have ever tasted. I think it's cinnamon tea with honey and some kind of flavoring. It's amazing! But now we simply had to settle for Chai Lattes, which are good, but not special.

So the other day I was trying to think of something that would keep me awake and sooth my sore throat and decided that, while unhealthy, a Chai Latte was required. I ordered it and as I was walking out I saw *gasp!* a sign that said "Try Stan's Special Tea." IT'S BACK! The Chai Latte turned to ash in my mouth. I felt like a traitor and robbed of a special tea experience. I couldn't even finish the drink. It was tragic. Today I redeemed myself and bought a Special Tea.

It's been a busy week. Some Jenkins East girls had a Singles Awareness Day party on Valentine's Day over in Warren. That was really fun. I hadn't been around them in a while. I'm not really that bitter about Valentine's Day as I don't really care about being single. In fact, I think it would be kind of awkward it I had a boyfriend. I just don't know how to approach a relationship like that. I think Valentine's Day is kind of pointless anyways. Hallmark holiday. But oh well, it was an excuse to catch up with some old friends. They put henna on my arm and I tried to make it stay, so I didn't put on my sweatshirt when we walked across campus to Duvall. Well, it was snowing and it came off anyways and no wonder I was sick the day after. But it was fun nonetheless.

I was up really late last night. I got to the music building around 11:00, left at midnight and I still had some homework to finish. So I was really tired today and after German got out at 10:20 I slept until 12:30. It's been an odd day.

The 4.0 Principle

It seems a fundamental fact of college life that if I am doing well in one course, I inevitably have fallen behind in another.

A Typical Night

The ground is wet to the point of being marshland. I navigate my way around small lakes as I walk across the loop. It's just another late-night practice session at the music building (Alcatraz, the giant tetris block, the asylum for the mentally insane, whatever you want to call it). How can I express how much I hate these walks?

When it's foggy I don't mind so much. It's like London. When it's snowy out it's like Narnia. (Lampposts people). And in the spring and early fall it's warm enough to be enjoyable. But even with these things, there's something about forcing yourself out into the cruel world so you can struggle over a few measures of Bach or ii-V-I progressions. It's just not pleasant.

Some nights, as I said, it is fairly enjoyable. You get a little peace from dorm life and from the 2-students per square meter population ratio here. Some nights I can even make out a few stars. Those are the nights when I'm confident and at peace with the world and my professors and have no major homework pending. Then I can stroll through campus at my liesure, eagerly anticipating the joys of piano. On the way back I can play "dodge the sprinkler system," which seems to be the college's intensive secret-agent preparation course.

Then there are nights like tonight. Oh February you are the most dismal of months. What I wouldn't give for some clear blue sky and a little sun! It's all grey and soggy and dead. I don't always mind grey. I'll take soggy too. But the dead part. That I don't like. And like I said, there's something about feeling "done" with homework only to walk all the way across campus and sequester yourself in your cell, er, practice room. My professors can't say I'm not dedicated.

I Am Very Happy with my iTunes Purchases

So last night I found myself literally addicted to music. I could not stop listening to it. I could NOT. I'd been responsible, done my homework, read the news, organized my stuff etc. I was enjoying the free time I have when I'm not taking lessons and browsing iTunes utilizing the gift card I had. I was up until 2:00am for no good reason. I kept thinking, I should go to bed...

Anyhow, I've decided to start doing some music posts so I can rant on music. Maybe I'll talk about my favorite composer or why I like a certain band or what I don't like. Doesn't matter. You will read it and be enlightened. :-) Actually, you'll probably read half of it and be bored. But I'll write it anyways, as I do this entire blog.

SO let this be the first of those posts. The following is a list of my iTunes purchases and why I purchased that particular song. Maybe a tidbit about the band or something. Let's beging.

1. Let's Fall in Love - Diana Krall
This was a guilt purchase for me in two ways. My esteem of Diana Krall's music has gone down recently. I like the smooth feel of it, but her piano solos are lacking I think and her voice really isn't that great. And she doesn't even scat. So as a jazz student I really should be spending my money on better things. But this is a nice rendition of a nice song and I have another guilt reason. Diana Krall's music has been part of my library for years because I've ripped it from friends or something. So I felt I should pay for what I've been using.

2. Let's Face the Music and Dance - Diana Krall
So, same reasons as above apply. I actually find the approach here kind of unique even if it is a little, I dunno, kitchy. This was always my favorite of Diana Krall's work, this and 'S Wonderful I guess.

3. Old Castle, By the River, In the Middle of a Forest - Hiromi
This is actually a "jazz" tune believe it or not. It's probably the closest to New Age I'll ever let myself get without hating myself. Years and years back I heard and absolutely gorgeous and rather unjazzlike tune on Eastern's jazz station. I wanted a copy, but all I could remember was the word "castle" and that it was by some Japanese artist. I've been looking for it ever since. Thing is, I don't think this is it. What I remember of the tune is that it was soft and beautiful. This, by contrast, is an upbeat melody with driving rhythm. But I find it to be very cool. The improvisation may not be varied, but I like the feel. I've already listened to it 10 times. Hiromi it seems, is a young (26) up and coming jazz artist. Some don't like her style (the improvisation is the main complaint) but many are in awe of her technical brilliance. I sampled a few of her songs and this was the only one I really felt I wanted to purchase. Like I said, a little too New Age.

4. Dance Me to the End of Love - Madeleine Peyroux
This singer has a really unique timbre to her voice. There's no way to mistake her with anyone else. Of all her songs I've heard this is my favorite. Generally with these songs I'm purchasing I really like one or two songs they've done, but the rest of their work doesn't strike me enough to buy a whole CD. It's not that I dislike the entire "Careless Love" CD. It's just not my style. I like rhythm and it's generally slow. This though has a great groove. I may put it on the blog in the near future. Or why not now? Notice the piano embellishments and that guitar strumming.

5. Stray Cat Strut - Stray Cats
This is the song I learned to swing dance to! With CYT of course. It has ever since had a special place in my heart. I would never buy a Stray Cats CD. This is absolutely the only song of theirs I've ever really liked. It's that laid-back groove and guitar strumming. I apparently have a soft spot for guitar strumming. Might have something to do with growing up with a dad, mom, and brother who played guitar.

6. Hollywood Nocturne - Brian Setzer Orchestra
I wish I could put this one up for you to listen to but it's not on that blog music site... Brian Setzer Orchestra, like the Stray Cats, is kind of a swing/rock mix. This falls into a more jazzy category. Generally there's an emphasis on the electric guitar. It's hard to describe. You'd have to listen to it.

7. Kiss Me - Sixpence None the Richer
Guilty pleasure alert! Every once in a while a pop song comes along that utilizes its simple chord changes so well I can't help but like it. This song's lyrics flow really well and it has that descending bassline that I just can't resist. I'm a sucker for descending basslines.

8. Bibbidi-Bobbidi-Boo - Louis Armstrong
If you haven't heard Satchmo sing this song, you're missing out on one of the most unique musical experiences I've ever had. This is from, I kid you not, "Disney Songs the Satchmo Way." *trails off into histerical laughter*

9. The Bare Necessities - Louis Armstrong
Don't get me wrong, I love Louis Armstrong, but that last song is just too weird. Weird in an amazing-I-can't-believe-I'm-hearing-this way. Now THIS makes sense to me. It's really the most fun arangement of this I've heard. Why didn't he do an I Wanna Be Like You rendition I'll never know.

10. Bei Mir Bist du Schon - The Piccadilly Orchestra
I've never heard of this group and it's not likely I'll search them out, but they do have the best modern version of this song on iTunes. First heard this tune at a college swing dance. I wish I had their version but I couldn't find it, this, along with the Benny Goodman version I bought, were the next best things.

11. Bei Mire Bist du Schone - Benny Goodman

12. Good Enough for Granddad - Squirrel Nut Zippers
My brother introduced me to this group when I was in jr. high. They're like 20's tin pan alley gone wild. I love the name.

13. I've Found a New Baby - Squirrel Nut Zippers

14. Danny Diamond - Squirrel Nut Zippers

So, my first musical reviews. Expect more.

I Have Returned!

Very sorry for my long absence. I'm not exactly motivated to fight with my home computer's slow connection during Christmas break and then I went to Europe. I'm setting up a separate blog for that experience.

Anyhow, since I got back I have managed to get the cold that everyone on the trip had. My roommate had one as well when I got back here so really I didn't have a chance. I enjoyed my week at home and really wasn't ready to go back to college and face the world again, but I'm coping. This semester is going to be tough though. Tough though. Interesting word combination. I have my first upper-division course, Reporting for Mass Media, and though the prof is nice it's going to be a challenge. I'm looking forward to German again, and taking Ear Training and Music Theory IV (and jazz piano) from Brent, who's returned from sabbatical. I have an Intro to Business class that is very interesting but also a pain. It's the kind of thing I'd rather audit but I can't because it's required for my business track.

I had a rather disappointing experience with classical lessons. I was so close to getting a new teacher, and at the last minute it didn't work out because of scheduling. Apparently Bev is really booked this semester and she didn't have room for me (she blames the fact that I didn't sign up for a time early enough, but I was REGISTERED. I figured you had to leave enough spaces for all your registered students.) But I didn't care because I almost got to take from someone else, but she only had room during my morning classes and there's absolutly no way to switch them around. I didn't want to approach her about maybe staying an extra half hour and in the end Bev offered to do so, but now this will be really awkward. Not only will we be really pressed for time, she'll blame me for this extra time she has to spend. Oh boy.

On the positive side I am now in Pirate Band! It's our concert band. Unlike wind symphony or orchestra you don't have to audition, so soon I will be back on french horn.

My dearest Katrina is off on the France study program and so I must endure the semester without her. It's already a little lonely. I thought I might get back in touch with my Jenkins East girls when I found out Smac was in my business class, but she ended up dropping it because she got into another class she was waitlisted for... And so I must rely on my fellow music majors to keep me from becoming a complete hermit. I'm just not naturally social and the fact that I'm taking 18 credits (back in laureate society! yes!) and in the music building a lot doesn't help matters. But it's impossible to get too isolated here.

Well, this post must be short I fear. I'm starving having not had dinner and I need to make German flashcards and maybe get some sleep. Tomorrow's a busy day. I need to buy my brother his birthday present (a jazz fake book). He got a mandolin for Christmas from his wife and so we have a lot of pictures of him playing it during Christmas day.

Did I ever tell you about holidays in my family? I don't think so. When I was growing up we generally spent the holidays with my mom's side. My dad's side isn't really into it all that much. Anyhow, what with my aunt being a violinist in the symphony, my dad having played in a bluegrass band, and my mom having sung in WSU's choir there was always a lot of music. Folk music to be exact. Janey never played, but she always called on my dad to get out his guitar. Soon both my parents would be playing and we would be singing various songs like Grandma's Feather Bed or, gosh my memory escapes me. My dad always does a rendition of Watermelon Wine and I'm determined to record it next year. Eventually my brother learned guitar so he would play too. As we grew up and my siblings went to college and Janey passed away this kind of died. But recently my cousin Bob has been reviving it at his place. It forces my dad to play guitar again and this year my mom accompanied on another guitar, my sister played piano, and my brother played the mandolin he'd gotten that morning. My brother's pretty much a genius.

Where was I going with this? Oh, I was looking through family pictures and I found one of my brother messing around with a mandolin, only he's like eight. So I'm picking up a copy of this year's Christmas pictures at my cousin's house tomorrow. That way we'll have a then and now of my brother playing mandolin. And then hopefully I'm going to the Symphony. And then home. Busy night.

Okay, now I really must leave you but I'll try and dig up a song that turns up at our holiday gatherings every year.

I'm proud to live in old West Idaho
Them other places can't compare with us.
But now I must relate what's happenin' in our state;
It's really causin' quite a fuss.

CHORUS
Oh, the interstate is comin' through my outhouse
They tell me I'm on their right-of-way
I'll sell today and I'll get rich but the path will end at the highway ditch
I'm makin' my last visit there today

Granny says to cancel Sears and Robuck;
Tell Uncle Sam to hurry up our dough.
With all this progress comin' we'll change to inside plumbin'
And shorten up our early mornin' stroll.

Uncle Ben has got a case of miseries;
A hikin' to that outhouse makes him tired.
But he'll be a gittin' better; he'll be an inside setter
When they install that cesspool in our yard.

CHORUS
Oh, the interstate is a comin' through my outhouse.
They tell me I'm on their right-of-way.
I'll sell today and I'll get rich but my path will end at the highway ditch.
I'm makin' my last visit there today.

Them engineers made 47 surveys;
They said to put it there and that was that.
They'll bring in a big steamroller and flatten my two-holer
But I'll keep right on votin' Democrat.

Someday when I grow old and feeble;
Some moonlit night I'll wake up feelin' strange.
I'll get up from my nap and stroll down my old path
And wake up in a great big interchange.

CHORUS
Oh, the interstate is a comin' through my outhouse.
They tell me I'm on their right-a-way.
I'll sell today and I'll get rich but my path will end at the highway ditch.
I'm makin' my last visit there today.

It's really not the same without the music, but you get the idea.

OH, and by way of my current musical offering we have part of Mozart's requiem. Dies Irae. Doesn't really go with this post does it? I guess you can ponder the diversity of music.